I used to want to…

At least a small part of everyone wanted to be an astronaut when they were young. It is curiosity which thrives us to do most of the things throughout our day after all, it’s just a shame that so few people are able to maintain dreams, even if it was from back when they were three… Nonetheless, it must be a great feeling to have something to dedicate your life to, be it a profession, a person, a hobby… whatever it is! If you’ve been able to form your life around something then I admire your talents. Give yourself a pat on the back. If you haven’t?  Pat yourself on the back anyway for being good at lots of things in smaller amounts.

Back when I wanted to be an astronaut, probably coming close to the age of 8, I had a small rocket shaped cushion. I’d say that this single cushion is the reason I’m a hugger (don’t take that the wrong way), because I always hugged that cushion. Not in the “Oh no, puberty is coming. Better get used to shoving a pillow on my lap” kind of way, I just used to imagine that it would some day take me away. As such, my imagination bled across my dreams.

It wasn’t as much the sense of exploration that made me want to do this, I was just a fan of independence from a young age. I just wanted the rocket to take me anywhere away from Earth. The reasons behind that are what they are, but escaping is probably something a lot of people are a fan of. This dream started to reoccur, just slightly altering along with my life. If I had a partner, then they might be on there with me… Played a cool game, I’d see things from that… If I had homework, I’d take it with me… If I was going through puberty, then what happened on my rocketship is none of your business… Well, it was around then that the dream became more fleshed out. Places to start going to, enemies yo defeat… The main enemy ended up being emotions, if you knew me them you’d understand why, but shooting a physical form of “Love” is more relieving than I care to admit, as every emotion I shot was then removed from me, ones I wanted to keep therefore ending up as prisoners. I’m weird, I know.

I still haven’t outgrown these thoughts, and I’m not exactly planning on ever doing so. Besides, I still eat rocket lollies…

I had that dream again last night, I think I’ll write it into a story tomorrow.

Thanks for reading

: : Ruby ❤ : :


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